Listening More, Talking Less

If we calculate the amount of time we talk versus the amount of time we listen, what would be the ratio? Would it tilt toward talking or listening? James exhorts, “Everyone should be quick to listen and slow to speak.” (James 1:19) A good friend of our family died last year who had an uncanny ability to listen. If you would ask her how she was doing, she would quickly turn the conversation back to what was going on in your life.

Last Sunday, I experienced the blessing of taking communion to a 95 year old gentleman, a widower who lives alone in the house that has been his for more than 40 years. In response to my question of “How are you doing today,” I heard about his wife of 52 years who died a few years ago; about his son who is a priest; about the many missions he flew in World War II and the Korean War; how he was a consultant to Congressional committees overseeing the Air Force, and finally, about his current health issues. What a blessing it was not to talk, but just listen.

We have the opportunity to listen wherever we are — at work, at home, or social gatherings. If our desire is to learn and grow in each of these venues, we soon realize that we don’t learn much from talking, but we do from listening. As an attorney for a large corporation, I found that I was able to serve my corporate clients better by listening more. At home, I serve and love my wife and children better by listening more. At social events I honor our guests by listening more. While my experience is sometimes spotty in some of these areas, I try to change course as soon as I realize that I am talking too much.

We can also listen even when we are alone. The Lord loves to put thoughts in our minds about various things going on in our life so long as we are open to hear him. When Moses was giving his last instructions to Joshua and the Israelites, he said, “Love the Lord your God, and listen to his voice and hold fast to him.” (Deut. 30:20) Jesus said, “My sheep listen to my voice.” (John 10:22)

I have often allowed the noise of everyday life to drown out God’s voice, particularly when I am in my car, listening to music, talk radio, or sporting events. Today, I am trying to listen to the radio less and the Lord more. He says, “Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10) Like Elijah, who went up on Mount Horeb to hear God, he did not hear him in the powerful wind, or the earthquake, or the fire, but in a gentle whisper. God loves to speak to us as a gentle whisper in our thoughts. Are we listening, or is the noise getting in the way?

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